War Machine, före detta Jon Koppenhaver, sitter för tillfället i fängelset. Och han kommer sitta där i ett par månader till. Han började med att underhålla oss med tre blogginlägg innan en domare skrek till och fick honom att sluta skriva precis det han ville.
HETAST JUST NU
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Nu går hans advokat igenom alla inlägg han skriver, innan de publiceras. Och innan du hoppar in efter hoppet, så kan det vara bra att läsa de tre blogginlägge innan, du finner del 1 här, del 2 här, och sist ut så har du del 3.
Efter hoppet har du de blogginläggen som har producerat sedan sist, som innehåller bland annat önskan om att ha sex med en macka, hans hat mot Junie Browning och homosexuella cellkamrater.
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First month down and only 11 more to go!! LOL! Fuckkkk sometimes it’s just unbearable here, especially at night. I sleep too much in the day and when bedtime comes I’m screwed! I just sit here trying to sleep, thinking about millions of things. Being in jail I miss a lot of shit – making love to my wife, my friends, my buddies’ two kids. But, most of all, I miss TRAINING. The last 8 years I’ve never not trained more than a month straight. I don’t know how I can make it a year. It’s like a drug. I’m addicted to competing, to pushing myself, to breaking down my training partners and perfecting my game. This sucks!
And this place, there are a few good dudes here, but man… the majority are just idiots. They can barely spell, can’t hold a decent conversation, and DRUGGED OUT. I’d say 95% of the guys in here have drug problems, HORRIBLE ones. These guys do 5 years in prison and are out barely a month and already back on new charges all because of drugs or committing crimes to buy more of them. It’s crazy! Someone will get some heroine or meth in jail or prison and like 4 guys will share the same needle to slam it. They could just snort it and be safe of disease but they are so impatient for the high they’d rather all share and risk it all. It’s really sad when you think about it. And worse than that, to me at least, are the Mexican youngsters who are ”excited” to get sent off to prison. Even if they could hold out and get a better deal and maybe do a year County time, they sign for the 3 year prison term 1st offer from the DA. I guess in the Mexican gang sub-culture you’re not a real ”gangster” ’til you’ve been to the pen. These are young guys, 18, 19, 20 years old. Healthy, with a long future ahead of them, BRAINWASHED – it’s fucked up. I guess there’s no way to understand it as an outsider.
All in all I’m doing well in here. Trying to stay positive. Some days I get depressed, mostly after visits. It’s easy for me to ”block” the world out and do my time but with each visit/phone call I get ripped back into reality and become away of how bad it really sucks. I wanna thank all of you again for supporting me with the nice e-mails and gifts. Some of you ask me what I want to receive in terms of commissary items… I don’t expect anything and therefore I won’t make any requests. Anything you want to send me will be greatly appreciated. Fuck! I really can’t wait to fight again! I’ve never been so excited about it in my life! I’m gonna train hard and wreck shop when I get out! Just watch and see!!
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Kinda shitty week for me. Guess I’m depressed or something because I didn’t workout at all. Been pretty much sleeping all day, and staying up all night long. And when I stay up, I don’t do shit. Just lay there with my mind going 200 MPH thinking about thing after thing after thing. I really need to get back on some type of decent routine. Hopefully next week is better. Also, I’m starting to get annoyed by a lot of shit…
People here are ”needy” as fuck and if you give them an inch, they push for a mile! Someone is always asking ”Hey man do you have any phone time?” and it’s always followed up with some huge desperate sob story and empty promises of getting paid back some how blah, blah. May not seem like much but they charge us 25¢ a minute for calls here and trust me, when I say, that shit ADDS UP QUICK! Then you have the coffee fiends, HOLY SHIT! You buy a bag of coffee in here and it’s as if you have a kilo of crack! Multiple people 1 or 2 times a day EACH. ”Hey brotha can I bum a shot off ya? Or even half a shot?” A bag that should last me prolly 2 months, because I seldom drink it, will prolly empty here in a week. Needless to say I won’t find out cuz on day 3 I gave the bag to Valencia next door to save myself the headaches. NEVER will I buy that shit again!
I dunno I guess it bothers me because I’m someone that has a very hard time asking people for anything. I HATE asking for stuff! Even if I really NEED it and my friend or family has plenty of it, I’d rather suffer than ask… lol. Fuck and I’m sick of being around STRANGERS! In my normal life, I’m very private. I’m only around people at my gym and then my girl and a handful of best friends. I don’t get along with most people if I have to be around them more than an hour at a time… how I have to LIVE with them… ugh. I’m especially sick of having a cell mate. I’m sick of smelling someone elses shit, sick of smelling farts, sick of hearing burps, sick of hearing/smelling anything.
If I didn’t have such great things to look forward to upon getting released, I’d easily lose it here. It’s a recipe for disaster and it’s no wonder to me why people come here for a year and end up doing LIFE… lol. Seriously though, for someone who legitimately has nothing… nothing to give them a reason to live, a reason to behave… It’s rather impossible to stay out of trouble here for those people. Anyway, enough of my complaining, trying to think of a story to tell you from this week…
There was this one black guy a few days ago. He made a very STUPID mistake. America’s Most Wanted was on TV and they mentioned somethin’ about a $50,000 reward for info on a guy. The dumbass says, ”Easy money!” All the other blacks at his table looked at him like ”Huh!?” He said, ”Ya man, shitttt… one time my friend and I saw a reward for some dude in our neighborhood and we turned him in and got 5 g’s! That was the easiest money I ever made!” And uh, in a place where almost everyone is here because someone snitched, it’s no wonder that he was forced into his cell, lumped up, and sent packing to the PC, ”protective custody” module… lol.
What else… sexual withdrawals anyone? Last time I went this long without some action was in the TUF house… I can’t imagine a year of this, FUCK!! I think some days I jerk it 3+ times! HAHA! I’d do anything for a warm apple pie or something… lol… Shit, in a few more months I’ll settle for a cold bologna sandwich!! LMAO!
One good thing about this place is that it makes me appreciate my wife more and more each day. She’s more than I could ever wish for, I feel very lucky to have her. It also makes me appreciate my friends and fans. You guys are being so supportive and I love all of your e-mails and generous gifts… I hope all of you know that I’ll never ”sell out” or become one of those fighters that become ”too cool.” I’ll always keep it real and stand up for what I think is right, no matter what! When I get released from here and start fighting again, I’m gonna continue doing what I started a few fights back… I’m gonna bring one fan in my corner/or at least backstage with me every fight. We fighters are spoiled by the experience but I remember how neat it was when I was brand new and backstage or in the corners with my old Lions Den teammates… I wanna share that feeling.
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Vecka 8
So another fake ass back stabber gets added to the list: Steve Bruno. Him and Junie Browning both have volunteered to be stepping stones on my climb back to the UFC.
On a different note, my old celly is gone. I hope he is able to stay clean and out of trouble. Funny shit is my new celly is GAY! LOL! He’s been in the same module as me the whole time but I never knew it! Now that he lives with me he knows that I’m not a homo-phobe so he told me and holy shit! You wouldn’t believe the stories. I asked him if he’s got any ”action” and he’s hooked up with two guys since I’ve been here. Crazy part is one was this skinhead guy and the other a young dude who actually had a hot girlfriend, I saw her at a visit. I wonder if she knows!? Weird, I guess you never know how people are behind closed doors. It’s a trip though. Whatever, it doesn’t bother me as long as no one pulls none of that gay shit on me! lol.
What else, this big white guy came in to our module last night. Fuck man… All of us ”housed” here are chill, get along great. Then once in a while we get one of these random assholes in here. They literally will be here only 2 days and almost start a riot. It took everything in me to not beat his ass! The problem was that he was disrespecting the blacks. The blacks all like me, but if they jump him all the other Whites & Mexicans are gonna jump and you have a riot. All I want to do is stay out of trouble and get on with my life so I pulled kind of a ”bitch move” and let a guard know what was brewing on the D.L. You can say what you want but it solved the problem.
I’m not about to get dragged into a riot and possibly get new charges over one dumb fuck. Long story short, they moved his dumbass to a different module. Yesterday I got an e-mail from a guy in Russia! I guess someone has been translating my blogs and putting them on a Russian MMA site… Crazy! Cool as shit though! It’s neat to know my words reach so far away. So after I wrote last weeks blog, I got to thinking… I really want to help out other up and coming fighters in their quest for ”making it.” It’s really hard working full-time and training/fighting in the early years. So I decided to take a page out of the old Lion’s Den book and start a ”Fighter House” along with my gym in Austin, TX.
Once our gym is up and running my partners and I are gonna rent a 3 bedroom house and a van in Austin. We’re gonna keep the pad stocked with basic things like eggs, oatmeal, brown rice, chicken, tuna, and bread. There will be bunk beds in each room and 2 dressers and a couch, big screen, and DVD player in the living room. We’re gonna have try-outs in the weight classes of 145-185. The 6 guys we pick will live in the pad and become a part of our team in Austin. In return, the fighters will be responsible for cleaning the gym, passing out flyers, and covering instructor’s classes when out of town. For extra $, they’ll be able to teach privates to the members/personal train them, whatever. If need be they can work a night or two at one of the local bars or something. No girls, alcohol, or drugs allowed in the house. But yeah, that’s the basic run down of things. There will be a little contract and other details still need to be worked out, but I really like the idea! We’re gonna have great trainers and a great facility, and I really hope we’ll be able to give some guys a ”kick-start” into the game while building my team up at the same time. SPREAD THE WORD!
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Vecka 9
My gay cellmate is really starting to get on my nerves. Just because I don’t judge or hate him cuz he’s gay doesn’t mean I wanna hear gay remarks towards myself. I almost had to slap the shit out of him the other day, he was getting too comfortable but after putting the fear in him he’s not acting straight as can be… lol
In a different story, one of the guys here turned up in an article in the paper for an attempted kidnapping. In the spirit of keeping peace in the tank, I went up to his cell, and I told him it’d be best if he went to ”PC.” He told the guard that he thought he was in danger (and he was, as I could only momentarily keep fools from smashing him). The guard however blew the situation off for more than 2 hours and eventually somebody went up to his cell and beat on him. They then locked us all down & went cell to cell asking us if we saw anything. I said, ”Yeah, 2 hours ago I saw him tell YOU that his life was in danger and that he needed to be moved but I guess YOU didn’t want to do your job.” LOL He didn’t like that too much so it’s no wonder that when we ordered commissary that night my order was ”lost” which meant no snacks all week! =(
Most all these cops here are real nice to me. I may have to change my attitude towards them, I guess after all, the majority of them just come to make a dollar. That being said though, a couple of these guys are fucking DICKS! It’s funny though, the cops that everyone hates here are cool to me, and the cops that everyone likes are dicks to me! WTF!? LOL!
Anyway, I started working out again this week. Feels kinda good but at the same time makes me miss real training. I can just imagine how rusty I’m gonna be when I get out… Ugh! Whatever though, ain’t shit but a lil’ obstacle and God knows I’ve encountered plenty of them along the way. Speaking of God and all that, I just read the book ”Holy Blood, Holy Grail” I’ve always believed that the Bible was edited and certain things omitted, but wow. That book sheds a lot of light on things. With the way our modern governments twist shit and lie, it’s really no surprise that it was done then and even to a greater degree. I wonder if somewhere, maybe locked up in the Vatican, the REAL unedited Bible exists? Whatever though, at the end of the day all anyone can really do is follow their conscience. It must be there for a reason. Maybe that is the real ”Bible” & it’s inside each of us. I’m willing to bet that if you follow that, any ”Heaven” will let you in.
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Vecka 10
Finally had to kick my celly out. Fool got on my last nerve. And not 2 hours later, I already got a new one sent in! Ain’t that a bitch!? I HATE living with people! Fuckers always making lil’ messes, snoring, and talking. I don’t like talking all the damn time. Dudes see me reading and yet still just wanna jaw on, WTF? And I guess football season started because that’s all they show on TV now… I HATE watching sports! Especially with 40 dudes I don’t know who act like their damn brother is on the team by the way they yell & scream. I’unno. When I was a kid, I loved football, but these days I don’t even pause when I see it on TV while surfing channels. If I wasn’t trying to be a ”good boy” I’d get in trouble so I could go to the ”hole” for a while and relax.
Enough bitching. On a different note, I may have to change my name to Reading Machine… lol. I really enjoy it! I think it’s another thing Man is losing out on due to technology. No one really reads anymore or at least I know my friends and I didn’t. I’m gonna continue to do so when I get out. I found a bad ass author named Conn Iggulden who wrote a couple of series about Julius Caesar & Ghengis Khan. It’s ”historical fiction” but doesn’t stray off the path of truth much at all. I love learning about ancient warriors. But yeah, I urge you to those books. Thanks for the continued e-mails/letters of support! I can’t wait to get out and fight for you guys again!
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Vecka 11
Finally getting back into decent shape in here. Too many weeks of eating cakes and being sedentary got me soft! LoL! Jail is so fucking BORING!! OMG! Thanks again for all the e-mails/letters. It really makes the time go by a bit smoother.
So, my module had it’s first lil’ riot this week. Whites and the Mexicans got down. I could care less about this gay jail political crap, plus I’m trying to stay out of trouble, so I backed against the wall in my fight stance. Not willing to engage but at the same time not gonna let anyone rush me. LMAO! I might as well have been a ghost! They saw me there, clear as day, but no one was brave enough to step up. Afterwards the other Whites were mad at me for not helping… I told them if they had a problem they can come to my cell. No one volunteered. I don’t need anyone to back me up and I sure as Hell am not gonna risk more trouble/time protecting some lames that I couldn’t care less about.
Anyway, I read in the paper that @jessejane is gonna be dancing at De Ja Vu on Midway in San Diego. You should go support her if you live in SD – she’s a cool ass girl.
So I’m fascinated with Ghengis Khan. I’ve been reading about him and I think he may have been the hardest mother fucker to have ever walked the earth! Boy was I screwed over to be born in this time period. Warriors are a thing of the past, no room for them these days. What a shame.
Ghengis Khan was a badass, but I’m not sure he was crazy enough to sell his own body parts. Just sayin’.
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Så nu har vi bara 40 av dessa blogginlägg kvar att se fram emot innan herr Machine blir frisläppt.
